Would you adam and eve it?

Woo was off the blog yesterday … sorry … we were getting our hair done ….

Anyway, we’ve discovered that cash machines in East London are offering customers the option of using Cockney rhyming slang to get their hands on their bees n honey … that’s money to our international readers! 🙂

Yesterday, five ATM’s in the East End ‘went Cockney’ for three months … and anyone opting for Cockney rhyming slang (instead of English or any other available language!) will be asked to enter their Huckleberry Finn (PIN) before choosing how much sausage and mash (cash) they want …

Those wanting to withdraw 10 pounds will have to ask for a speckled hen …

… while the machine may tell more unfortunate users it’s contacting their rattle and tank (bank of course!!).

So … with all this going on, Woo thought it would put a visit to our lovely coffee shop through the cockney translator. We put it in …. and out came …

Blimey! I’m beef stroganoff down ter Woo ter missin’ link some lovely Joe Roffie an’ ‘ave a dorothy dandridge. Nuff said, yeah?

🙂 So now you know what to tell your china plates ……..

David Hasslehoff …

Is this enough to put you off your morning coffee and croissant? Couldn’t resist I’m afraid, as today is a very special day … Martin barrista massimo’s birthday, and he shares it with none other than David ‘the Hoffman’ Hasslehoff. Martin will also be serving coffee in his underpants today to celebrate this amazing coincidence, so it’s definitely worth a visit to Woo!

Anyway, back to reality … on finding out these two wonderful men share the same birthday, I thought it would be a good use of time to compare the 2 and see who comes out top of the birthday pops.

Round 1 … sense of humour (my personal favourite way to judge)

The hoff clearly has one or he wouldn’t have such a great chest wig. He also wouldn’t have released jump in to my car. He gets an 8 out of 10. Martin … well what can I say. He has been making me laugh out loud for too many years and no one can write a ‘close to the bone’ one line text message quiet like him. He gets a nine. Take that Hasslehoff!!

Round 2 – Cars

Yeh … this is a tough one. The hoffman had Kit … a sleek, black, talking speed machine … Martin had an old BMW and a battered Mazda. Sorry mate, I’m gonna have to give this round to Big Dave … 9 to err 4.

Round 3 … Dress sense … yeh baby!

So … the Hoff … tight leather trousers, tight black underpants, shirts undone to the waist, that kind of half bouffant, curly brown mop of hair … and Martin … well no one wears tweed quite like him … and then there’s that half bouffant, curly brown mop of hair. Yeh right Hasslehoff, you pretender … Martin wins …. 8 to your 7!!!

And finally (or I really will be here all day) round 4. Out on the toon …

Mr H was allegedly thrown out of a bar at the All England Club in Wimbledon in 2006 for drinking and rioting. Hasselhoff denied it. If that ever happened to Martin, he’d claim the full glory so birthday boy, barrista massimo extraordinaire wins 10 to 5!!

Final scores show our barrista coming out victorious. The best birthday boy has won!!!

Woo Hoo!!!!